A few weeks ago while standing in line to order our burritos for lunch, I told my mom that I want to find someone who cares enough to memorize my Hot Head Burritos order by heart. She laughed and so did I, but I’m not sure if she understood that I was serious.
I’ve noticed more and more lately that there are so many of us who have become obsessed with the idea of the little things about us being noticed and committed to memory by someone else. I want someone to memorize the way I laugh and my favorite songs. Someone who would know why my favorite books are my favorite books and that I’m loyal to a fault. This person will want to know why I forced myself to start drinking coffee and that I actually grew to like it. I want them to know that vanilla candles are my favorite and that when I do my laundry I have to wash everything that day or I don’t feel like I got anything done. Most importantly, I need them to know that I order a little burrito or a little bowl (depending on how I’m feeling that day,) brown rice, black beans, chicken, queso (the dollar extra is worth it,) pico and corn, taco sauce, sour cream, and cheese.
It’s not even just that someone would care enough to notice these little things about us but that we would care enough about them to do the same. I always felt lucky when I was close enough to anyone to know the little things that make them who they are. Out of all the people in the world they had chosen me to share that information with and that’s no small thing.
Recently I realized something awesome. I was reading this devotional that I read every night before bed and it started out, “Come to Me for understanding since I know you far better than you know yourself.” It’s kind of overwhelming to think about how well God knows all of us personally. He didn’t just notice the little things about us but took the time to create all those things that make us all different. He knew that I would love to read about adventures all over the world and would constantly daydream those same kind of scenarios for myself. He let math not be my greatest subject but gave me a love for almost all the history classes I’ve ever taken. He knows that I love watching kids and playing with my niece and nephew, but am honestly terrified of having my own. He knows all this, he made me this way. He knows the ugly things about myself that I don’t like to think about. He knows that I can still get angry about things that happened two years ago because I have a hard time forgiving and letting things go. He knows these things and forgives me for them. That is a beautiful thing. It’s something so fundamental to our relationships with Him.
God knows the number of hairs on my head. Matthew 10:30 “But the very hairs of your head are all numbered.”
He created us carefully, and wonderfully. Psalm 139:14 I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
I read Psalm 139 after my devotional and here’s just the beginning of it for you:
Psalm 139:1-6 “O Lord, You have searched me and known me. 2 You know my sitting down and my rising up; You understand my thought afar off. 3 You comprehend my path and my lying down, And are acquainted with all my ways. 4 For there is not a word on my tongue, But behold, O Lord, You know it altogether. 5 You have hedged me behind and before, And laid Your hand upon me. 6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; It is high, I cannot attain it.”
So one day I will meet the man God has for me that will take the time to learn and love all the little things that make me who I am, and I will learn all the things that make him who he is. I’ll feel lucky to know his heart that way. Just like that, I should be searching God’s heart and taking the time to learn who He is. How sad would it be if He knew the ins-and-outs of all of my heart and I didn’t even try to get to know Him on a more personal level. It’s beautiful that I don’t have to be scared of what I’ll find. He finds all of my flaws when he looks into my heart but in his there’s just perfection and more love than I could ever reciprocate.